Thursday, July 14, 2011

We're not dead last, though. SPOUSAL SENTENCE MATCH!!!!!!!!!

S: We hemmed and hawed; we yammed and yawed.

B: We thought about stuff and stuff thought about us.

S: I thought about one thing in particular, and I'll build a weak thesis out of it: You'd think that Sufjan's Illinoise, boasting its ambitious conceit upfront, might produce the trickier, the more surprising album, but Kanye's My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy instead surprises more and, with the exception of a few tracks (looking at you, Chris Rock) poses the more provoking questions.

B: Yet it has its flaws beyond the extended Chris Rock fun times, including pretty lackluster production, considering the lengthy and star-studded Hawaii hangout that produced this album and the fact that the second best song on the album (next to "Runaway") is the one that's closest to the Sufjan sound—"Lost in The World."

S: "Lost in the World" is not the second best song on the album, but more importantly, not that I know anything about production: Maybe you just don't like the production but it is actually pretty awesome.

B: Clearly like is a huge (if not the entire) part of it and I'm no expert on hip hop production, so I can back off to "I don't like the production," and by the same token I'll edit your comment to "I like the production a lot," and since we're limiting ourselves to one sentence at a time, I'll make it a run-on and further state that I like the production on the Sufjan album quite a lot and, while you may be tired of his sound, you have to admit he was innovating on this album.

S: Yes, but if I have to hear the John Wayne Gacy song one more time I will off myself, and also, I would argue that Sufjan may have refined his sound on at least albums one through five, but that he's got a fairly obvious twee schtick that schticks around if you will.

B: This is the problem with assigning two of us to review something because it's easier to argue with yourself than your spouse and it ends up coming down to this: I like the Stevens album better than the Kanye album, even if we call it tree stick (isn't that redundant?) and you like the vice versa, so how to decide?

S: Oh, so you call Stevens by his last name and Kanye by his first, which is so racialist, and did you know that the more you listen to the Sufjan album, the more you realize that the first half of the album is largely filler?

B: The more I listen to the West album, the more I want to listen to something else, like Within and Without by Washed out, which is totally up my alley and is the winner of this Death Match showdown.

S: That is how I feel about Sufjan, except I don't know anything about Washed Out, but even if it is the ambient bordering on flaky stuff I hear coming from your study, I would be less tired of it than ...Illinoise, and also, too, I would say a bunch of serious (and seriously awesome) shit about My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, but I already said that to you in person and you didn't get it.

B: I've been meaning to tell you that I'm leaving you and this seems like as good a time as any.

S: If this is because I am mean, I can change.

B: Okay I love you, let's stay together.


  1. i'm glad you posted, but i am confused. it's like when i go to take a dump, but i pee instead.

  2. I agree, Washed Out should win the death match. All these other albums now sound so dated. For once, I actually like one of Pitchfork's best new album picks. Yay...I'm hip again.